Adult Children

Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACA)/Dysfunctional Families is a Twelve StepTwelve Tradition program of men and women who grew up in dysfunctional homes.

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The Laundry List

"14 Traits of An Adult Child"

01

We became isolated and afraid of people and authority figures.

02

We became approval seekers and lost our identity in the process.

03

We are frightened by angry people and any personal criticism.

04

We either become alcoholics, marry them or both, or find another compulsive personality such as a workaholic to fulfill our sick abandonment needs.

05

We live life from the viewpoint of victims and we are attracted by that weakness in our love and friendship relationships.

06

We have an overdeveloped sense of responsibility and it is easier for us to be concerned with others rather than ourselves; this enables us not to look too closely at our own faults, etc.

07

We get guilt feelings when we stand up for ourselves instead of giving in to others.

08

We became addicted to excitement.

09

We confuse love and pity and tend to “love” people we can “pity” and “rescue.”

10

We have “stuffed” our feelings from our traumatic childhoods and have lost the ability to feel or express our feelings because it hurts so much (Denial).

11

We judge ourselves harshly and have a very low sense of self-esteem.

12

We are dependent personalities who are terrified of abandonment and will do anything to hold on to a relationship in order not to experience painful abandonment feelings, which we received from living with sick people who were never there emotionally for us.

13

Alcoholism is a family disease; and we became para-alcoholics and took on the characteristics of that disease even though we did not pick up the drink.

14

Para-alcoholics are reactors rather than actors.

Membership

The only requirement for membership is a desire to recover from the affects of growing up in an alcoholic or otherwise dysfunctional family.

A Personal Invitation

This is your personal invitation to come to ACA and to keep coming back. Your presence in meetings helps us in our recovery. We know that this program works for us.

We have yet to see anyone fail who honestly works the program. This is our path to sanity, our program to serenity.

 

How We Work A Program Of Recovery

Individuals recover at their own pace. We have learned by experience that those ACA members who make the greatest gains in the shortest amount of time are using the tools of recovery.

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